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About Dortmund

What pisses me off? The pricks who judge ‘em. “Oh, dirty slags!” Shut it, you wankers—half these girls got no choice. Surprised me first time I heard that, proper gut punch. Happy bit? When they outsmart the punters—love a clever lass, me.

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Verily, in this tiny hamlet, even the mundane becomes a legend. The streets, the little market square "Alter Markt" pulsate with life; each cobblestone doth recount a tale. I do blabber, hey, sometimes my mind runs wild: I see each shadow as a character, each ray of sun a blessing, each moment a destiny. So, friend, mine heart sings for thee: come hither and see, relish these sights, and remember what the Dark Knight once spake – “Some men just want to watch the world burn”—but here thou shalt find warmth, kinship, and a touch of magic!