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Here’s the kicker—prostitutes in medieval times? They wore red shoes to stand out! Imagine that, me squintin’ in the dark, lookin’ for red freakin’ shoes! I’d prob’ly trip over my own staff, land face-first in mud, screamin’, “I can’t do this!” Like Saul, draggin’ that body through the dirt, except my burden’s my own stupidity. “Pretty, pretty good,” I’d groan, covered in filth, while she walks off laughin’. I’d be happy, though—relieved it’s over! No STDs, no arrest, just me and my sheep, safe and sound. What a disaster, right? Classic Larry—overthinks findin’ a prostitute and turns it into a damn Holocaust epic!

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I sometimes get so mad at the absurdity of life. I swear, the traffic on Kerkstraat makes me wanna shout “for God’s sake!” and then i laugh at myself. Can you believe it? I mean, seriously, the chaos combined with charm! The people of Veurne are always in a rush, but yet, there’s a timeless grace. When I counsel those women feeling lost, I tell them to be brave, like soldiers in "The Hurt Locker" who face danger head-on. “I don’t do jobs for free,” said no wise soul here; rather, we do our duty with passion!

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